Serving...

I am going to jump a little out of order again; I want to reflect on Maundy Thursday while it is still fairly fresh.

I offered a Maundy Thursday Service of Footwashing and Communion. Services outside of Sunday morning are not usually well attended. although I did have 55 or so on Christmas Eve. I did tell the congregation this Maundy Thursday service would not be over 30 minutes. Lengths of service outside of Sundays are something I have to contend with because of the number of young children that we have. We don't have childcare, and it makes it a little difficult. It will be something I look into this next year...offering child care for services other than Sunday morning. Anyway...

As I said, these services are not always well attended. I didn't know whether to expect only me, or anyone else. I ended up with 15, which for such a small church (125 membership), and this being the first kind of service like this, I thought it was pretty good.

I had gone in earlier in the day and set up for this service. I had the altar table covered in candles, all different kinds and sizes along with my crystal crosses. I had moved one of the large chairs down in front of the altar and had my foot washing bowl and pitcher from my commissioning set up along with two large towels. I also had the Elements for communion on the altar table, using a beautiful chalice that I had been given by Nancy when I left St. T's. I found a beautiful glass paten to match it. So I was set.

I had a short message and went through the communion liturgy, after which I instructed those that felt comfortable to come forward, allow me to wash their feet and then they could partake of communion and have a time of prayer at the altar and that after everyone had finished and was agin seated, they would be dismissed, and I asked them to leave in cotemplative silence. I also gave them the option that if they preferred, I would wash their hands.

It was a humbling experience, to say the least, as I knelt before them, offering in love the sacrifice of washing their feet as Jesus had washed the disciples. I encouraged them to go into the world and offer a sacrificial love to others.

There was only one who had a hand washing and she had on a dress and hose, so it would have been a little more difficult for me to wash her feet. Everyone else allowed me the privilege of serving them in this service.

I had one young girl (she is in 1st grade) who, after I washed her feet, asked me, "Ms Kim...who is going to wash your feet?" I explained to her that there would be no one to wash my feet, just as no one had washed Jesus' feet...that I did this becaus of my love for her and to help her learn to serve others, even when sometimes it was not an easy or fun thing to do. She then reached out and hugged me and said "I love you..." I was almost in tears....

As I said, there were only 15, but, it was so moving that I came home and cried. I realized how much one can love those one has only known for such a short time...love in the way that Christ loves, and that was very powerful for me. I hope to do this again next year, and perhaps there will be more that will participate.

Baptism by Canoe?!?

Shortly after my arrival, the congregation started talking about the "Church Camping Trip." I was told that one of the previous ministers had started this Canoeing/Camping Trip. I was also told that my predecessor had not gone, but that previous ministers in the history of this expedition had. I decided to go, thinking I might get an insight I might not otherwise have.
Here are my writings on the Church Camping/Canoe Trip.

PRE-TRIP:
Well, I am off camping this weekend with the group from the church. I asked “what kind of camping are we talking about?” I am not really into ‘roughing it’ in tents, etc. My Girl Scouting days are LONG over! They assured me it was civilized; that we have cabins and indoor bathrooms.

Then they brought up bathing suits; “You know we go canoeing!” WE WHO???? “You are supposed to bless our trip.”

I told them “I can bless the trip from shore! Canoes tip over too easily, and I don’t swim!” “Oh,” they said, “You must wear a life jacket!” Like that is going to help! When I go to my cousin’s down on the lake, I bungee cord myself to the dock and threaten anyone who comes near me or makes waves! But, we shall see. The water is not supposed to be very deep, however, I said that was all a matter of perspective. If I have Nancy Kellond’s height, yes, the water might not be deep, but remember, I am a SHORTIE!!!

I am looking forward to it. It will give me a chance to get to know some of the congregation a little better. We have a Lay Speaker coming in for Sunday worship, and I will have a little service at the lake.

I am leaving the kittens plenty of food and a couple litter boxes, and hopefully, will come home to a house that has not been totally destroyed. They couldn’t totally destroy it, because I haven’t managed to get it totally fixed yet! They are confined to den and kitchen, but that is their usual space anyway, so it shouldn’t be too bad.

POST TRIP:
I am home from a weekend of white-water canoeing on the White River in Broken Bow, OK. Okay…so I didn’t exactly “shoot the rapids” I DID make it through the shoot…it was just before we went over the rapids that we hit a rock, beached upon that rock and I decided that preaching FROM that rock might not be a bad thing! I could get my sunblock out of the canoe and just sit there!

But, obviously, I am writing this so I am OFF the rock. I was helped through the fast flowing waters to shore, where I walked, yes WALKED around the rapids and rejoined my canoeing partner for the rest of the 4 mile trip. Once the heart slowed down to a more natural rate, I was able to enjoy the scenery and trip. Later that evening I took another boat ride (a ten passenger boat!) around a beautiful lake in Hoachie Town, OK(Long story on the town’s name!) It was wonderful, the boat didn’t rock and I didn’t have to paddle! I was a little sore in the shoulders last night, but am back to 100% today.

We had a great time, and the group told me I could stay on as pastor! I didn’t take my camera so there are NO Pics! Sorry ‘bout that, but I can give you names/numbers if you want verification!

I returned home to 2 very happy kitties and we are all sitting here now, snuggled together as I type this!

I also got some good sermon stories this weekend! The group told me that is one thing they knew would happen! We have one little boy (almost three-he didn’t go canoeing!) who insists on calling me ‘newpastor’ He will say, “Mawmaw, can I go listen to newpastors radio (my Ipod!)” Or Mawmaw, is the newpastor going on the boat too?” Maybe one day, I will no longer be “newpastor” I think perhaps this weekend has begun that for me!

Culture Shock

I arrive in Beckville around 7:30 pm, after unloading my kittens and walking around the house, I call John (a member of the church) to let him know I have arrived. He tells me he will be right over. I proceed to unload some of my stuff from the car. I have a bedroom that is furnished with furniture and I have brought sheets, towels, a clock and some personal items so that I can at least know that I will have a bed to sleep in. The moving van is scheduled to arrive around 7am the next morning.

Shortly, there is a knock at my door...it isn't John or his wife, and I don't know who it is. I open the door and she introduces herself..."Ruth." She tells me that John had called her because she was closer than he was and she could get there a little more quickly. She also tells me she has prepared some spaghetti for me, and asks would I prefer to eat it here, or go to her house. I tell her I was pretty well exhausted, and although I appreciated the invite, I thought I would prefer to eat it here.

John arrives just momentarily and the three of us make a quick walk through of the parsonage. We look at the living room and I ask if I need permission to paint. You must understand. The furniture in the living/dining room is really nice, but the walls are painted dark forest green and about every 6 inches there is a 6 inch gold stripe. Then on the green stripes at either end of the room are gold paint stamped 6 inch dragon flies!!!

"Do you not like dragonflies?" Ruth asks. Oh dear...first issue.
My response: "Well, I don't mind dragonflies, I just don't really like them on the living room wall..." (Cross my fingers, hoping I am not stepping on any toes before I have even gotten moved in!)

Ruth states, "I don't like them!" (Whew! OK! First disaster averted).

Ruth says she will run home and get the spaghetti and while she is gone John and I talk briefly about the church service coming up on Sunday. He shows me the church keys, explaining which is which. Ruth returns with the spaghetti, a lettuce and tomatoe salad and a half loaf of toasted French bread.

Both of them bid me goodnight, and I am left with the kittens. I am actually kind of hungry and suddenly realize: I HAVE NO SILVERWARE, NO DISHES, NO GLASSES to use for the spaghetti. I burst into tears and call my folks. I just can't believe this. "I don't have any dishes or silvverware and I can't even eat my spaghetti! (my favorite!) I guess I am going to run up to this little Texaco station and see if they have any plastic dishware."

My dad very gently says, "Kim, remember where you are..."
"What do you mean?" I know where I am.

"That Texaco station is probably closed."
"Oh dad, it is only 8:15..."
"Kim...remember where you are...in small towns things close early!"

Again, I respond, "But it is only 8:15, just barely dark!"

I bid them good night, jump in the car and head to the Texaco station just about 0.5 miles from the house, and to my surprise...IT IS CLOSED!!! It closes at 8PM. Talk about culture shock...! Coming from a city that is constantly buzzing, where there are 24 hour gas stations along with 7-11's, coffee shops, restaurants, and drug stores, I am floored! It is CLOSED!

I again, burst into tears and head down the road to see if by chance there is a store open in Tatum, or at the worst, if there is any fastfood place where I can get something to eat.

The small grocery store is open (til 9, and it is now 8:45)! I grab some plastic silverware, plates and cups, along with some kitten chow and soft drinks and head home. The road is very dark and there isn't any moonlight; in fact, about the only light is an occassional lightening flash.

I return to the parsonage, dip up a bit of spaghetti, which is by now cold! Put a little salad on the plate and break off a piece of the bread and sit in the middle of the den floor tears streaming down my face, and praying... "God...I am trusting you...You got me here, and I am trusting that you will show me the way."

I hold each of my kittens, telling them they are in their new home and that we will get through this together...and then after making up the bed, I set the alarm for 6:00 AM and fall into a deep sleep...

God had brought me to this point, this place in my life, in my ministry and I was trusting that I would be led to whatever it was that God had planned for me!

Moves, moves and MORE moves!

Back to the original story line!

Now, in September of 2002, I had moved in Houston from one apartment to another. This was in the middle of seminary and unpacking unnecessary boxes was the last thing on my mind. Then, in May of 2003, I quit my job and start my internship, which goes from June 1, 2003 through May 31, 2004. I stay in the apartment during this time.

Come that January of 2004, I begin to think about what will be next. I mean, I will have no job, no source of income, no way to pay for rent, car note, school... panic begins to play with my mind. In all this process, I decide to throw my name in for a student appointment; that would at least help with the expenses, and perhaps give me a parsonage or housing allowance.

My mom then has a set back in her health and I begin to realize there is no way I can deal with school plus a student appointment and with my mom's health. I withdraw my name from the appointive process after much prayer and discernment. OK, so I am back to square one.

Do I cash in my savings, my teacher retirement (I worked as a nurse for the Univ. of Texas, MD Anderson Cancer Center and therefore had teacher retirement!), or do I take out a student loan. St. Timothy's very graciously allowed me to live in their parsonage as the minister serving there had her own home. I would be allowed full use of the kitchen two bedrooms, the master Bathroom, the laundry room. That left the living room, the dining room and two other bedrooms for the church. They used this parsonage as an extension of the church, often holding meetings there, the UMW holding some lunches/meetings there as well. I would be able to continue to assist in worship, make hospital calls when I was in town and generally just be available if needed.

It sounded like a pretty good deal. They did not require me to pay rent, phone, electric...since all this was already being covered by the church. As it turned out, I would be in Dallas from Monday afternoon through late Thursday night...the times the church most often needed the parsonage for meetings anyway.

So just a little over 18 months after moving into my new apartment, I moved to the parsonage. Again, because I was in school, I left most everything except the essentials in boxes, and we stored them in the smaller of the two un-used bedrooms.

After recieving my appointment, Moving Day comes again...about 15 months after moving into the parsoange. Thank goodness, most of the stuff was still packed. The conference pays for the move, but you are responsible for making all the phone calls, arrangements and other details.

The movers arrived around 10 AM on moving day to pack my stuff. They were going to head to Beckville, but not unpack me until the next morning, bright and early. After they left, I packed my car with a few essentials that would be needed that night, packed up my new 'babies'...PJ and Timmie...two kittens about 3 months old. I went to my parents, showered, washed my clothes, said my good byes and left. I would arrive in Beckville late that afternoon and be there for the movers in the morning.

It was a LONG, tearful, drive to Beckville. It seemed like "FOREVER!" It is about 3 1/2 hours from Houston, but you could not have made me believe it that day! I stopped and got something to drink about half-way; called my contact in Beckville and let him know where I was. He told me the house would be open and to call him when I arrived.

I got to the house, took the kittens, went in and sat in the floor for about 30 minutes praying...
"Oh God...where are you??? I don't think I can do this!!! I need your help..." To say that I was petrified would have been an understatement. Outside of living in Denton while in college, I have never been away from home...from family. Yes, I had lived independently, but never without having family close by. This was a big change, and to top it off, a BIG change to a very small town.

Wow...Easter has come and gone!
It was a busy time, and it finally hit me I think yesterday. I would try and do something, get ready to go on a visitation and have to sit back down. I contemplated taking a shower, but felt like I would just slip down the drain if I did. I was really wiped out.

Today I am back to normal, but now have to really work to catch up. Sunday is coming and my sermon for this week is NO WHERE near completion. I had to attend a meeting today that pretty much took up the day, this was after going to the hospital early this morning to see my neighbor who was having a cardiac cath, and then returning to Longview to pick her up when she was discharged. She has no family here that can pick her up, so I told her to call me.

Once I got home and settled in, I began to look at the scripture lessons for this week. I decided on the Gospel, and have picked out my sermon title, which is unusual. I do not normally get the title until the sermon is done. However, this time it jumped out at me. "Not Until..." The scripture is from John and is Thomas' encounter with Christ after the resurrection. So now I am working on the sermon. Hopefully I will have it finished tomorrow.

I do have to go into town in the morning...to the court. A young woman is up for revocation of her probation. I feel like I need to be in the courtroom for her. This has been a difficult situation for me. There is a lot of dysfunctionality in the family and I am really having to work at setting boundaries with this woman; and that is hard. My nature is a "fixer". I know I can't do that in this situation. It is beyond anything that I can fix. I am also having to deal with my feelings about her lying. I haven't yet confronted her on it because I am afraid of loosing control and really getting angry with her, which wouldn't be good.

I am afraid she may end up going to prison (again) and then I will have to figure out how to deal with her there. She is a very angry young woman, blaming everyone else for her misfortunes, not taking responsibility for her actions and I just really get frustrated with that.

Well, I think I am going to call it a night. Hopefully now that I am feeling better and not so pushed, I will be able to add more frequent posts.

Time Flies

It has been a bit since I have posted. An explanation...
Illness, funeral, and Easter!

I caught a cold and the cough has held on for quite a while. I finally gave in and went to the doctor who felt like because the cough has been so persistant I should see a pulmonologist, and maybe have a bronchoscopy. Well, don't that just sound fun!

She said she would give me the names of a couple of docs, but she didn't; and to be truthful, I didn't remind her. Then...I get in the mail, a letter telling me I have an appointment set up to see on!

So, OK, I decided to go. I was really tired of coughing anyway. It turns out that I do not need a bronchoscopy (woohoo!!! rejoicing here!) He basically said what I had been told before, I have a reactive process that happens when I get a cold. It is now called a Chronic Cough Syndrome. For me, it is like an asthmatic...my bronchi just become irritated and continue to cause me to cough. He gave me a couple of inhalers, a dose of Prednisone and some GOOD cough meds. The cough is almost gone. Thank you Dr. G!

Then, also earlier this month, a sweet member of my church who has been in a nursing home for the past 10 months after having a stroke last spring, died. I was asked to do her funeral. Now, I have read scripture and offered a prayer at a funeral. I also did deliver a message just recently, but I have never had the responsibility of performing the funeral as the lead pastor!

I wanted to do a good job...Mrs. B was a long-standing member of the church, kind of a matriarchal figure and I wanted to honor her and also bring God glory through the life she had led. I was nervous, to say the least. However, it turned out to be a wonderful service. Everyone (and not that I am expecting praise, or desiring it) but everyone said I had managed to capture Mrs. B and her life. So, I was relieved.

Then...on top of this is Easter. This is my first church, and as such, I have had lots of "firsts"...First Advent, First Christmas, First Lent, First Easter, First baptism, First funeral. Since it is a small church in a small community (752!) I wasn't sure what we would have. The Maundy Thursday Service of communion and footwashing was attended by 15, and I was pleased. The Good Friday service had to compete with girls softball and a funeral in Baytown. It was only attended by 4, but those four and myself were blessed.

Hopefully after Easter, I can get back to posting on a more regular basis...

Wishing everyone a blessed Easter. Celebrate the Risen Lord! Amen and amen!