District Board of Ordained Ministry and Spaghetti!

Once I had decided to pursue ordained ministry, I began the process of becoming a "certified candidate." This process involved answering questions about my calling, my understanding of ministry and questions on my theology. It also required meeting with the Board of Ordained Ministry on a yearly basis to allow them to check my progress and to continue to approve me to proceed.

The first time I met with them, I had been in seminary just a little over a semester. (I know, it seems odd that I did it this way; one would think I would go before the board, get their approval and then start seminary. I just did it a little backwards, but then quite a few do it this way!) Anyway, I was, to say the least nervous about meeting with the Board. This is the District Board, which is just ministers and lay persons from my home district; but still for me it was very intimidating. I had no idea what they would ask and that "test anxiety" kicked into high gear.

I get to the place where the dBOM is meeting and there are a couple of other people sitting there besides me. I quickly learn when my District Superintendent comes out and takes one of these persons in that he had just finished his time before the board. I could hear clapping and congratulatory comments. Then the DS comes out, greets me and tells me they are running a little bit behind and asks if I am pressed on time. Like I am going to tell him "YES!" I reassure him I am fine and he takes the other person in for their interview.

I sit there alone, praying silently for the butterflies to be squelched, and about 20 minutes later, the candidate comes out and looks amazingly calm, cool and collected. He reassures me, "It isn't bad at all!" Within a couple of minutes, again the DS comes out, takes this person back in and th clapping and congratulatory comments are repeated. The candidate comes back out grinning, shakes my hand, and wishes me luck.

During his interview, a delivery boy begins to bring in what appears to be food. Several large tin pans, some bread, iced tea, and bags of salad. The DS comes out and again apologizes for the delay and asks, "Would you please have lunch with us and then we will do your interview?" Now, in all honesty, at that moment in time, the last thing I wanted to do was eat, much less eat with the dBOM who holds in their hands my future! "Sure" I reply (wondering where my voice had come from!)

The DS takes me in where the lunch is being set up and introduces me saying that I will be joining them for lunch. He takes me to the food and I look down and see....SPAGHETTI! Now, Italian food happens to be my favorite, but I am wearing black slacks and a WHITE blouse! I can just see me with spaghetti all down the front of me as I go in before the dBOM for my interview.

The DS hands me a plate and proceeds to serve me. "Just a little," I manage to eek out. I then get a little salad and a glass of tea and go to sit down. The District office is in one of the area churches and this particular meal is taking place in a Sunday school room...a YOUTH Sunday school room...with smaller YOUTH chairs! Not the most comfortable seating arrangement, but the one nice thing is it does make it a little easier to keep from spilling food all down the front of me.

I sit down to eat, trying to look relaxed while the whole time I am thinking..."don't spill...don't spill..." I get through m spaghetti, when suddenly here is the DS holding the pan about ready to dip me up some more. I manage to get out an "OH! No thank you" before he dips me some more.

After the lunch, I run to the ladies room to check for those infamous "food particles in the teeth" while they are re-convening. The DS comes and gets me, takes me in and I begin the interview process. In all honesty...it WASN'T that bad. I am there, oh about 20 minutes and then dismissed so they can make their decision.

Now, remember, I had seen two previous candidates go through this and neither had taken very long in the decision process. I went into the ante room to wait. I waited, waited, waited...and waited. It was probably close to 10 minutes and I was beginning to panic, and was almost close to tears. The DS come rushing out, grabbed my hand and began to apologize. "Oh Kim, I am so sorry..." I almost didn't hear anything else, but I hung in there. "We shouldn't have left you out here like this. We were trying to make some decisions about how to handle the rest of the afternoon. Come on in, come on in..."

Well, by this time my knees were like rubber and my heart was beating like a drum. I wasn't sure if I was going to make it. I walked in and was almost afraid to look around; but when I did, the clapping started and the congratulatory remarks were made. "We are pleased to tell you...you are now a certified candidate. And again, accept our apologies for our rudeness."

So, there it is...I am certified. I had to repeat the process each year until I graduated, but none of the remaining times were near as stressful or eventful. I can say now, I don't think I could have handled it if they had been!